Now back tracking a bit to way before my half marathon.. the story of how I ended up registering for my first triathlon in an attempt to eliminate the excuses... and finally get back on the road to fitness
As hard as it was I did ok sticking to my plan, a couple times a week I loaded the kids up in the jogger and went for a walk/run and I tried to get to a class at least once every two weeks.. but I was tired.. and guilty.. and I just had a hard time keeping my motivation levels where they needed to be. Sometimes I thought to myself who cares that I’m fat?? I am married and have two kids do I really need to care what I look like? So what if I have a closet FILLED with beautiful (expensive) clothes from express that I haven’t been able to wear in 3 years? So what if I won’t be able to shop at express (my all time favorite store) EVER AGAIN. It just didn’t seem like it was worth all the effort. It was something I struggled with for a bit.. the reality was I was ALWAYS an in shape person, I always ran.. even in middle school.. I was on the cross country team and still woke up early most days to run, high school I ran with the dog, and got into rugby, shoot I was in the freaking army for pete sake.. more then that I was a SAW gunner in Iraq, I carried over 100lbs of combat gear on my persons on convoys on a fairly consistent basis.. I even went to the gym and lifted weights.. and I didn’t lift weights like no girl are you kidding me?! I had 3 friends that took me to the gym with them, taught me how to lift, proper form, weights, rep etc. I wasn’t one of those pansies on those pully machines (not that we really had them over there) I was lifting for real.. I was doing bicep curls with 25lbs dumbbells.. with difficulty at first but then I started banging them out like it was nothing I came back home so ripped even my dad was like damn, I think you might be able to kick MY ass…I drove his point home by wrapping my arms around him and lifting his entire 240lb body off the ground a good 6 inches without much strain. Now here I was flabby arms flabby stomach chubby legs.. shoot I missed that wow factor.. I missed people looking at me and saying DAMN I do NOT want to mess with that… its just how I am.. I need that oh sh!t factor in my life.. what can I say I really should have been born a man!
Anyways… after realizing I needed that oh sh!t factor in my life I started thinking about how I could get that back.. and after catching an episode of scrubs where JD enters a triathlon in honor of his impending birthday bingo the light came on.. JLo aka Jennifer Lopez did a triathlon after she had her twins to help her get back in shape.. and completing a triathlon is most definitely in the oh sh!t category…because when it comes down to it how many people really do them? It would be easy(ish), I was a good swimmer in fact swimming is one of my all time favorites activities. I had been working on running again the only issue in my mind was the bike.. I used to bike a lot growing up but had I ever really biked 12 miles?
I started bouncing the idea around in my head for the next couple weeks…my husband and my bff both told me I was a little off my rocker and the reality was at this moment in time there was NO way I could run for 3 miles strait let alone run 3 miles after swimming for 750 meters and biking 12 miles..but I could if I worked at it.. and while I worked at it I would lose weight.. right?? Isn’t’ that how it works? You bust your butt and you lose weight? I started talking to my brother in law about it, I told him I was thinking of doing it and there were 2 coming up, one in July and one in October. I was thinking of doing the one in October because then I would have a lot of time to train and not look like a total idiot… He was like well why don’t you just do both, then you can do better the second time, then he asked me what exactly was involved. He was the epitome of fitness, he spend a lot of time in the garage lifting weights, jump roping and busting out on the elliptical… it was insane how much this kid worked out.. but hey when I was his age that’s where I was too
So he squinted his eyes as he was thinking and said” yeah that sounds alright I might do that with you” hmm well if he was going to do it I couldn’t really have him do it alone, and I had less of a reason to NOT do it. The next day at work I messaged him I asked him are you sure you want to do this? Really in July?? He was like yeah let’s do it up why not are you down? I was trying to find a million reasons why I shouldn’t do it.. come on me do a triathlon?? With a little less than 3 months to do it? I realized all I had was excuses..I finally just said f*&k it… why not…and just like that I was committed to doing a sprint triathlon…
Monday, December 27, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Tucson Half Marathon
Going in a completely different direction in this one ;) This posting is all about my adventure running the Tucson Half marathon with the best running partner of all time….
We were paranoid we weren’t going to wake up on time… so we each set our alarms on our phone AND we set the alarm on the clock radio in our hotel room… at 4:15 on the dot we jumped up from sound sleep to the chaos and noise of 3 separate alarms going off in unison… I wish there was a camera in the room videotaping us in our immediate excitement as we hopped around the room shutting off alarms and scooping up our piles of running clothes and getting ready to head out.
Luckily we prepped as much as we could the night before… affixing our disposable running chips to our shoes, and laying out our numbers with safety pins… the two items (aside from your actual running shoes) that were absolutely necessary for the race.
Amongst the shuffle we managed to stuff our faces with peanut butter smeared on whole grain bread and a couple bananas… it is the pre race breakfast of champions you know… and we were going to own every aspect of this race!
We grabbed up our energy chews, water and drop bags and made our way to the lobby. It was already bustling with runners.. grabbing up free breakfast.. sipping on coffee and water chatting it up and acting like today was like any other day... we found our way outside to the long line of busses ready to take us to the start line.. we finally found the half marathon bus and shuffled aboard and took the first 2 empty seats we could find meanwhile laughing and joking about the army and how you never picked your seat you just shuffled to the back and filled in with a calculated organized manner.
I chatted with my seat mate while eavesdropping on several conversations as I scanned the buss to observe my fellow half marathoners… not that I was paranoid or trying to scope out the competition.. its just runners are a interesting group of people…they don’t fit one prototype.. you can’t people watch at an airport and say “oh that guy is definitely a runner”. Some of us are short, some are tall, some are thing and some of us are big boned… they have names for us… Athena’s and Clydesdales…Athena is a female runner that is over a specified weight… for the Tucson Marathon it was 160, for men (Clydesdales) they have two classes one over 180 and one over 220… they even have awards for the top three finishers in each category… it’s a way for us to still feel like we have a chance to win something.. because a 191lbs runner like myself is no match for one of those 125lb lean thin runners you see in the Olympics...
Anyway after a bit we arrived at the destination…we debussed only to find that in North Tucson aka Oro Valley the weather was a bit colder at 530 am!! Luckily they had heat lamps and we huddled with the masses absorbing body heat as long as we could… finally the clock ticked 630 and we made our way to the drop busses… we had to strip down into our running skirts (something we both thought was super cool and had to invest in for the race.. hey if you don’t look cute why do it??) and shirts and checked our bags with our excess clothing on the buss to be picked up at the finish line.
We were paranoid we weren’t going to wake up on time… so we each set our alarms on our phone AND we set the alarm on the clock radio in our hotel room… at 4:15 on the dot we jumped up from sound sleep to the chaos and noise of 3 separate alarms going off in unison… I wish there was a camera in the room videotaping us in our immediate excitement as we hopped around the room shutting off alarms and scooping up our piles of running clothes and getting ready to head out.
Luckily we prepped as much as we could the night before… affixing our disposable running chips to our shoes, and laying out our numbers with safety pins… the two items (aside from your actual running shoes) that were absolutely necessary for the race.
Amongst the shuffle we managed to stuff our faces with peanut butter smeared on whole grain bread and a couple bananas… it is the pre race breakfast of champions you know… and we were going to own every aspect of this race!
We grabbed up our energy chews, water and drop bags and made our way to the lobby. It was already bustling with runners.. grabbing up free breakfast.. sipping on coffee and water chatting it up and acting like today was like any other day... we found our way outside to the long line of busses ready to take us to the start line.. we finally found the half marathon bus and shuffled aboard and took the first 2 empty seats we could find meanwhile laughing and joking about the army and how you never picked your seat you just shuffled to the back and filled in with a calculated organized manner.
I chatted with my seat mate while eavesdropping on several conversations as I scanned the buss to observe my fellow half marathoners… not that I was paranoid or trying to scope out the competition.. its just runners are a interesting group of people…they don’t fit one prototype.. you can’t people watch at an airport and say “oh that guy is definitely a runner”. Some of us are short, some are tall, some are thing and some of us are big boned… they have names for us… Athena’s and Clydesdales…Athena is a female runner that is over a specified weight… for the Tucson Marathon it was 160, for men (Clydesdales) they have two classes one over 180 and one over 220… they even have awards for the top three finishers in each category… it’s a way for us to still feel like we have a chance to win something.. because a 191lbs runner like myself is no match for one of those 125lb lean thin runners you see in the Olympics...
Anyway after a bit we arrived at the destination…we debussed only to find that in North Tucson aka Oro Valley the weather was a bit colder at 530 am!! Luckily they had heat lamps and we huddled with the masses absorbing body heat as long as we could… finally the clock ticked 630 and we made our way to the drop busses… we had to strip down into our running skirts (something we both thought was super cool and had to invest in for the race.. hey if you don’t look cute why do it??) and shirts and checked our bags with our excess clothing on the buss to be picked up at the finish line.
I would have been a bit frosty in the 40 degree weather in my running skirt and tank top if I wasn’t so completely excited (and nervous) about the 13.1 mile trek that was fast approaching…as we shuffled over to the start line we kept pumping each other up.. “this is going to be so awesome” “I can’t believe we are about to run a half marathon” “this is crazy” etc etc…
Alas a lady comes on to the mic.. “all runners with a 5-6 minute mile pace or better come to the starting corral” as many of us giggled at the thought of running 13.1 miles at that pace we were able to move up closer to the starting corral.. since they were only regulating who started first we decided we wanted to get as close to the front as possible…2heats later we found ourselves at the start line. My heart was beating in my chest as I looked to the road in front of me… before I knew it I heard “mark” “set” “GO!!” and though I had been telling myself I need to make sure I start off at a moderate pace I felt myself shoot out of the corral… I felt amazing.. untouchable… unstoppable… until a group of girls running with a garmin stated they were running at a 10 minute pace… YIKES I knew keeping up a 10 minute mile pace for 13.1 miles was probably not a doable goal for me… so I turned to jen and asked her how she felt about the pace.. to fast I said??? She said no its fine.. if we keep this up we should be good! In my mind I was thinking oh man not sure if I can keep this pace up but knowing that a big part of running is mental I pushed it out of my head and pushed forward…as we turned on to route 77 the sun was coming up and we could see the pinks purples and browns in the desert sky bouncing off the mountains… if running wasn’t taking my breath away the sky certainly was and I used the landscape to find some sort of zen as I kept my feet moving toward the finish. The first 3 miles were a bit of a blur.. all I know is they went by fast… it seemed every 5 minutes I was hitting another mile marker and high fiving jen (we high fived each mile marker as a way to commemorate the small victories along the way) finally after mile 4 I realized I must have slowed down a bit because the mile markers seemed to be spaced out a bit more…but we kept up a good conversation as we went along, giggling at the runners that follow Jeff Galloway’s method of “running” and follow a specific run to walk ratio… I mean even if you do PR (get a personal record) you can’t say you “ran” a pr…. Right??? Who knows… we were just brainwashed by the army… and in the army running is running.. walk is not apart of the equation.. actually if you DO walk you are considered a dirt bag… and you are heckled and mocked until you start running again. This is us hamming it up at about mile 4~
Alas a lady comes on to the mic.. “all runners with a 5-6 minute mile pace or better come to the starting corral” as many of us giggled at the thought of running 13.1 miles at that pace we were able to move up closer to the starting corral.. since they were only regulating who started first we decided we wanted to get as close to the front as possible…2heats later we found ourselves at the start line. My heart was beating in my chest as I looked to the road in front of me… before I knew it I heard “mark” “set” “GO!!” and though I had been telling myself I need to make sure I start off at a moderate pace I felt myself shoot out of the corral… I felt amazing.. untouchable… unstoppable… until a group of girls running with a garmin stated they were running at a 10 minute pace… YIKES I knew keeping up a 10 minute mile pace for 13.1 miles was probably not a doable goal for me… so I turned to jen and asked her how she felt about the pace.. to fast I said??? She said no its fine.. if we keep this up we should be good! In my mind I was thinking oh man not sure if I can keep this pace up but knowing that a big part of running is mental I pushed it out of my head and pushed forward…as we turned on to route 77 the sun was coming up and we could see the pinks purples and browns in the desert sky bouncing off the mountains… if running wasn’t taking my breath away the sky certainly was and I used the landscape to find some sort of zen as I kept my feet moving toward the finish. The first 3 miles were a bit of a blur.. all I know is they went by fast… it seemed every 5 minutes I was hitting another mile marker and high fiving jen (we high fived each mile marker as a way to commemorate the small victories along the way) finally after mile 4 I realized I must have slowed down a bit because the mile markers seemed to be spaced out a bit more…but we kept up a good conversation as we went along, giggling at the runners that follow Jeff Galloway’s method of “running” and follow a specific run to walk ratio… I mean even if you do PR (get a personal record) you can’t say you “ran” a pr…. Right??? Who knows… we were just brainwashed by the army… and in the army running is running.. walk is not apart of the equation.. actually if you DO walk you are considered a dirt bag… and you are heckled and mocked until you start running again. This is us hamming it up at about mile 4~
Regardless we just kept going… at mile 6 we dug out our powerade gel bites to replenish the energy we had expended the last 6 miles… that is another reason why I love running… what other sports do you know of that actually ENCOURAGE eating WHILE you do it?!
Mile 7 came and went…then mile 8… we couldn’t believe how fast this run was going… it goes to show how much adrenalin can really carry you when you need it… each time we saw a person from marathonfoto we cheesed it up.. cheered as loud as we could… put our hands in the air like we just didn’t’ care…. A couple pics even captured smiles and laughs from runners behind us as we pumped ourselves up…hey you have to do what you have to do right?
I have to say Jen is one of the most motivating people I know… besides the high fives at every mile… and her high fiving every sheriff and police officer holding traffic… each time there was a spectator just standing there looking for “their” runner SHE started cheering and clapping… getting them to start cheering for the rest of us runners that were out there.. she said ha they aren’t going to just stand there and ignore the rest of us! What’s that??!! Remembering her energy along that run still makes me laugh out loud to myself even as I’m writing this… I need to make a pocket sized version of her that talks.. so every runner can have the kind of energy she inspires! Like here for example.. at mile 9~
Finally we hit the 10 mile marker… at this point you only have a 5k left… so it’s all downhill from there right?? Well the whole course was down hill… until we got to the 12th mile.. after we hit the 11th mile marker we turned a corner…. to a HUGE hill… well maybe it wasn’t that huge… but after 11 miles of running it LOOKED huge… so I put my head down… dug deep… expanded my stride and fought to stay right behind jen as she turned up her turbo… finally we made it phew…and then my ipod died DAMN!!! Why didn’t I charge it??? I was thinking to myself how evil it was to throw a hill in so late in the race especially with no ipod to keep you going when I started hearing a deep drum beat.. BOOM…. BOOM… BOOMBOOMBOOM… I looked up and at the base of yet ANOTHER steep hill was a huge group of drummers with the biggest set of congas I have ever seen!!! They were playing what seemed to be a type of Native American Tribal music… it had a strong beat… and had a peaceful yet empowering rhythm… I put my head down yet again… dug down deep in my soul yet again… lengthened my stride (yet again) and pushed it to the top of the hill
Phew we turned another corner after that one… I was noticeably looking for the mile 12 marker after that… I was ready for the race to be over… those hills really gave me a run for my money…luckily soon after we hit the mile 12 marker… that was the happiest I was to see a mile marker the whole race… I knew that with only 1.1 miles left I could conquer this thing.. I could already feel the soreness in my legs.. but I kept going… a girl with a pink sweatshirt passed us yet again…(we had been playing tag) I thought to myself uh I hate that stupid pink sweatshirt!! I’m so sick of seeing it!! Yet I couldn’t seem to find it in myself to turn up the volume and finish strong.. I knew I COULD but because of a mental mind block I have unless I came to the 13 mile marker OR could see the finish I wasn’t going to be able to punch it… Jen started feeling it… I told her do it.. punch it get to that damn finish line…I’ll be there soon! Lol as she started to take off I could see the huge crowd of people… and the cones started getting narrower…another girl I had been playing tag with me passed me.. and Jen started to get further and further away from me and I decided F-It… those bi*&hes were going DOWN!!! I found some sort of heart left in my chest and started picking up the pace… the two girls were neck and neck in the narrow shoulder so I yelled “MIDDLE” and leapt thru the tiny space there was between them… I yelled my apology as I know darting thru the middle isn’t proper running etiquette.. BUT there was no room and I wasn’t about to be DQ’d for stepping outside the cones!! Someone yelled “finish is around the bend!!” so I cranked it up even more.. I was pumping my arms so fast I must have looked like a cartoon.. you know when the roadrunner’s legs start twirling in a circle while its body just kind of stands still.. that’s what I felt like…but I didn’t care… arm momentum leg momentum I didn’t care I was going to get to that finish line!! I looked up and the clock said 2:21… then shock set in… and my legs went even faster… and I managed to cross the finish line just behind jen… I almost fell over as a kid handed me my finishing medal.. I think I might have even had tears in my eye…Jen and I said forget the fricken high five and hugged the sh!t out of each other as the silly marathonfoto people kept saying “over here over here!!! Marathon photo!!” hey couldn’t’ you see we were having a moment???!!!! We took our finishing photo and wandered around to the food tent.. I think the way I felt after crossing the line is the poster feeling for runners high… I was in a complete and utter daze.. everything was hazy and I felt like I was floating...(runners high might be interrelated to moderate to severe dehydration but that is just speculation) We somehow made it to the bus and back to our hotel… after we showered and got dressed we somehow managed to find a red lobster where we relished in our victory while sipping mimosas and chowing down!
We both decided that a half marathon really wasn’t that bad… and decided we were without a doubt going to start training for the full Tucson marathon next year….
Mile 7 came and went…then mile 8… we couldn’t believe how fast this run was going… it goes to show how much adrenalin can really carry you when you need it… each time we saw a person from marathonfoto we cheesed it up.. cheered as loud as we could… put our hands in the air like we just didn’t’ care…. A couple pics even captured smiles and laughs from runners behind us as we pumped ourselves up…hey you have to do what you have to do right?
I have to say Jen is one of the most motivating people I know… besides the high fives at every mile… and her high fiving every sheriff and police officer holding traffic… each time there was a spectator just standing there looking for “their” runner SHE started cheering and clapping… getting them to start cheering for the rest of us runners that were out there.. she said ha they aren’t going to just stand there and ignore the rest of us! What’s that??!! Remembering her energy along that run still makes me laugh out loud to myself even as I’m writing this… I need to make a pocket sized version of her that talks.. so every runner can have the kind of energy she inspires! Like here for example.. at mile 9~
Finally we hit the 10 mile marker… at this point you only have a 5k left… so it’s all downhill from there right?? Well the whole course was down hill… until we got to the 12th mile.. after we hit the 11th mile marker we turned a corner…. to a HUGE hill… well maybe it wasn’t that huge… but after 11 miles of running it LOOKED huge… so I put my head down… dug deep… expanded my stride and fought to stay right behind jen as she turned up her turbo… finally we made it phew…and then my ipod died DAMN!!! Why didn’t I charge it??? I was thinking to myself how evil it was to throw a hill in so late in the race especially with no ipod to keep you going when I started hearing a deep drum beat.. BOOM…. BOOM… BOOMBOOMBOOM… I looked up and at the base of yet ANOTHER steep hill was a huge group of drummers with the biggest set of congas I have ever seen!!! They were playing what seemed to be a type of Native American Tribal music… it had a strong beat… and had a peaceful yet empowering rhythm… I put my head down yet again… dug down deep in my soul yet again… lengthened my stride (yet again) and pushed it to the top of the hill
Phew we turned another corner after that one… I was noticeably looking for the mile 12 marker after that… I was ready for the race to be over… those hills really gave me a run for my money…luckily soon after we hit the mile 12 marker… that was the happiest I was to see a mile marker the whole race… I knew that with only 1.1 miles left I could conquer this thing.. I could already feel the soreness in my legs.. but I kept going… a girl with a pink sweatshirt passed us yet again…(we had been playing tag) I thought to myself uh I hate that stupid pink sweatshirt!! I’m so sick of seeing it!! Yet I couldn’t seem to find it in myself to turn up the volume and finish strong.. I knew I COULD but because of a mental mind block I have unless I came to the 13 mile marker OR could see the finish I wasn’t going to be able to punch it… Jen started feeling it… I told her do it.. punch it get to that damn finish line…I’ll be there soon! Lol as she started to take off I could see the huge crowd of people… and the cones started getting narrower…another girl I had been playing tag with me passed me.. and Jen started to get further and further away from me and I decided F-It… those bi*&hes were going DOWN!!! I found some sort of heart left in my chest and started picking up the pace… the two girls were neck and neck in the narrow shoulder so I yelled “MIDDLE” and leapt thru the tiny space there was between them… I yelled my apology as I know darting thru the middle isn’t proper running etiquette.. BUT there was no room and I wasn’t about to be DQ’d for stepping outside the cones!! Someone yelled “finish is around the bend!!” so I cranked it up even more.. I was pumping my arms so fast I must have looked like a cartoon.. you know when the roadrunner’s legs start twirling in a circle while its body just kind of stands still.. that’s what I felt like…but I didn’t care… arm momentum leg momentum I didn’t care I was going to get to that finish line!! I looked up and the clock said 2:21… then shock set in… and my legs went even faster… and I managed to cross the finish line just behind jen… I almost fell over as a kid handed me my finishing medal.. I think I might have even had tears in my eye…Jen and I said forget the fricken high five and hugged the sh!t out of each other as the silly marathonfoto people kept saying “over here over here!!! Marathon photo!!” hey couldn’t’ you see we were having a moment???!!!! We took our finishing photo and wandered around to the food tent.. I think the way I felt after crossing the line is the poster feeling for runners high… I was in a complete and utter daze.. everything was hazy and I felt like I was floating...(runners high might be interrelated to moderate to severe dehydration but that is just speculation) We somehow made it to the bus and back to our hotel… after we showered and got dressed we somehow managed to find a red lobster where we relished in our victory while sipping mimosas and chowing down!
We both decided that a half marathon really wasn’t that bad… and decided we were without a doubt going to start training for the full Tucson marathon next year….
Monday, November 29, 2010
Landing (hard) into reality
So there I was, in my special shopping happy place picking cute things off the racks to try on, I picked a variety of sizes, based off the clothes I had in my closet that no longer fit… after my first trip to the dressing room my heart was at my feet and I had a massive headache… turns out in all of my denial about the scale and how I appeared in the mirror.. I had ended up in the plus sized section. The only thing I could hear in my mind was FAT it kept repeating itself over and over in my head FAT FAT FAT!!!!! then numbers jumped in there FAT, 16w, FAT 2xl, FAT 227lbs FAT… I could not fit into anything smaller then a 16w… and had to look for clothes in the “woman’s” section. I was so frustrated… I immediately texted my best buddy Jen (F) and told her the news.. I needed to tell SOMEONE.. and get some sort of comfort over my devastating discovery, of course being the great friend she is, reassured me it would fall off, its ok, all the normal nice things you say to someone to make them feel better… then she promised me she would help me when she was back in town… bam right there.. I couldn’t be upset… I couldn’t be sad… I had to just get over myself and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT… I couldn’t make any more excuses, I couldn’t feel guilty about taking time for myself, I couldn’t use the cold or my husband’s constant travels out of town as an excuse.. I just had to do SOMETHING.
I immediately of course went to the shoe section…. Shoes always fit, and if someone is attracted to your hot shoes they might not notice how fat you are.. right?? A seemingly imbecile rationale, but I have a mild shoe addiction so the mere act of shoe shopping was enough to comfort my nerves…
As I left the store with my new fat clothes my mind was continuing to race… what was I going to do I kept saying to myself.. how am I going to do this? After stopping for one last indulgence at jack in the box and letting the kids loose in the living room I came down with a game plan. What were the obstacles I was facing? Time, I work full time so I needed to find a time outside of those 40 hours a week to do it. Guilt, I hated working, felt horrible for leaving my kids especially my newborn alone, and I always felt I needed to maximize the time I wasn’t at work being a mother to them. Energy, I had no energy.. I was exhausted how was I going to find the energy to even workout when I could barley keep my eyes open! Ok… now I have my obstacles, what now?? Then I had a flashback to a conversation I had with an old co worker from Virginia, she had told me she was just realistic with herself, she knew she couldn’t commit to an hour of exercise at a time, but she could do 15-20 so she made a goal to spend 15-20 minutes on her treadmill each evening whether her husband liked it or not.. I realized I needed to adapt a similar attitude… I couldn’t workout 7 days a week.. but I could do 3… and if I could stick to those 3 each week I would be better off then what I was doing now. I mean really was it that hard? We had some equipment in the garage, adjustable block dumbbells, a pull up/ab device even a small weight machine I could do some upper and lower body exercises on… and an elliptical. I also had a wii fit, and countless workout dvd’s. I didn’t want to leave the kids alone in the gym daycare after having them in daycare all day fine, I could make do with what I had at home and work around the kids…I realized I also had a double jogging stroller I had bought on massive clearance on Amazon so I could attempt to get back into running.. I tried to go out for walks with the kids, why not take them out for a run? It’s the same concept… so there I was.. a goal, a plan (sort of) one way or the other I was going to find a way to get fitness back into my life…
I immediately of course went to the shoe section…. Shoes always fit, and if someone is attracted to your hot shoes they might not notice how fat you are.. right?? A seemingly imbecile rationale, but I have a mild shoe addiction so the mere act of shoe shopping was enough to comfort my nerves…
As I left the store with my new fat clothes my mind was continuing to race… what was I going to do I kept saying to myself.. how am I going to do this? After stopping for one last indulgence at jack in the box and letting the kids loose in the living room I came down with a game plan. What were the obstacles I was facing? Time, I work full time so I needed to find a time outside of those 40 hours a week to do it. Guilt, I hated working, felt horrible for leaving my kids especially my newborn alone, and I always felt I needed to maximize the time I wasn’t at work being a mother to them. Energy, I had no energy.. I was exhausted how was I going to find the energy to even workout when I could barley keep my eyes open! Ok… now I have my obstacles, what now?? Then I had a flashback to a conversation I had with an old co worker from Virginia, she had told me she was just realistic with herself, she knew she couldn’t commit to an hour of exercise at a time, but she could do 15-20 so she made a goal to spend 15-20 minutes on her treadmill each evening whether her husband liked it or not.. I realized I needed to adapt a similar attitude… I couldn’t workout 7 days a week.. but I could do 3… and if I could stick to those 3 each week I would be better off then what I was doing now. I mean really was it that hard? We had some equipment in the garage, adjustable block dumbbells, a pull up/ab device even a small weight machine I could do some upper and lower body exercises on… and an elliptical. I also had a wii fit, and countless workout dvd’s. I didn’t want to leave the kids alone in the gym daycare after having them in daycare all day fine, I could make do with what I had at home and work around the kids…I realized I also had a double jogging stroller I had bought on massive clearance on Amazon so I could attempt to get back into running.. I tried to go out for walks with the kids, why not take them out for a run? It’s the same concept… so there I was.. a goal, a plan (sort of) one way or the other I was going to find a way to get fitness back into my life…
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
fat girl intro....
I woke up one day and realized everyone around me was blogging… wtf is a “blogger”?? I’m from Vermont… we don’t “blog”.. we bog!! Apparently the two things aren’t related…
anyhow I am in the middle of a new adventure, one toward being “fit” once again. I figured why not document it? Maybe someone can learn from it.. maybe they can get some laughs out of my adventures.. who know… besides I see blogs on EVERYTHING, nobody wants to go to the library and read books anymore.. they want to go on a computer and read “blogs”…
I am 27 years old… but don’t tell anybody that in reality I have been 30 for the past 3 years.. I have two wonderful children who have caused quite a ruckus to my figure, well a combination of them, getting “older” and getting lazier.. example..High school weight 120-130 US Army Weight 150-155 Civilian weight 160-165 max pregnancy weight with baby 1~ 225 post baby #1 weight 180 max pregnancy weight with baby number 2 ~245 (woah) post baby weight 227 (ouch)
Hmmm could I live with topping the charts at over 200lbs?? yes I could.. after all I couldn’t’ have a regular exercise routine and juggle school, kids, my husband and my job??!! Could I?? I managed as best I could on maternity leave, I tried to take advantage of the time I was spending with my children while making it to zumba class once or twice a week and group power (weight training) class once or twice a week… I tried to stick with weight watchers but counting points and being accountable was so hard with trying to feed an infant that wanted to nurse constantly and trying to entertain a 3 year old that was literally bouncing off the walls from being stuck inside with a mother tethered to her newborn brother.. after all it will just fall off right?? Isn’t that what everyone says? Even though the weight from my first didn’t just fall off it would be easier this time… somehow I had to believe that in my mind to keep myself from going crazy. I stayed happily in denial with Cleopatra until it was time to go back to work… I barley had a weeks’ worth of business casual clothes that fit me.. no worries I love to shop I’ll zip right over to my favorite store Ross and pick up a couple things for cheap… what was supposed to be a fun shopping trip for a few new items quickly turned into a terrifying experience….
anyhow I am in the middle of a new adventure, one toward being “fit” once again. I figured why not document it? Maybe someone can learn from it.. maybe they can get some laughs out of my adventures.. who know… besides I see blogs on EVERYTHING, nobody wants to go to the library and read books anymore.. they want to go on a computer and read “blogs”…
I am 27 years old… but don’t tell anybody that in reality I have been 30 for the past 3 years.. I have two wonderful children who have caused quite a ruckus to my figure, well a combination of them, getting “older” and getting lazier.. example..High school weight 120-130 US Army Weight 150-155 Civilian weight 160-165 max pregnancy weight with baby 1~ 225 post baby #1 weight 180 max pregnancy weight with baby number 2 ~245 (woah) post baby weight 227 (ouch)
Hmmm could I live with topping the charts at over 200lbs?? yes I could.. after all I couldn’t’ have a regular exercise routine and juggle school, kids, my husband and my job??!! Could I?? I managed as best I could on maternity leave, I tried to take advantage of the time I was spending with my children while making it to zumba class once or twice a week and group power (weight training) class once or twice a week… I tried to stick with weight watchers but counting points and being accountable was so hard with trying to feed an infant that wanted to nurse constantly and trying to entertain a 3 year old that was literally bouncing off the walls from being stuck inside with a mother tethered to her newborn brother.. after all it will just fall off right?? Isn’t that what everyone says? Even though the weight from my first didn’t just fall off it would be easier this time… somehow I had to believe that in my mind to keep myself from going crazy. I stayed happily in denial with Cleopatra until it was time to go back to work… I barley had a weeks’ worth of business casual clothes that fit me.. no worries I love to shop I’ll zip right over to my favorite store Ross and pick up a couple things for cheap… what was supposed to be a fun shopping trip for a few new items quickly turned into a terrifying experience….
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